AND WE'RE BACK

Technical difficulties kept this site dark for the past week or so, but the good people at BlogCo (motto: You get what you pay for) assure us that we're back in business. And so let's get to the news.

NUTRITIONAL SCIENCE HAS FINALLY CAUGHT UP TO FREELANCE DAD. PHYSICS IS STILL KEEPING A HEALTHY DISTANCE

This just in (unless you've been a regular reader of FD.com) : Juice will make your preschooler fat.

While fruit juice does have vitamins, nutritionists say it’s inferior to fresh fruit. The new U.S. dietary guidelines, for example, urge consumers away from juice, suggesting they eat whole fruit instead. The bottom line, though, is that “children need very few calories in their day,” Welsh said. “Sweet drinks are a source of added sugar in the diet.”

And don't even get us started on Sunny Delight and its frothy faux-fruit friends. Parents, if you need some aversion therapy, just imagine the Kool Aid guy as a creepy neighborhood fat guy driving around the neighborhood in a white van tailing your kids.

Dr. Rebecca Unger, who evaluates overweight children in private practice and at Children’s Memorial Hospital in Chicago, said the study backs up what she sees in the real world. “We do see kids do well when we cut out juice,” she said. “Sometimes that’s all they need to do.”

Beyond keeping them more or less out of traffic, there's very little we consciously do to benefit Small and Tiny's health. But when they were young, they rejected fruit juice (along with real fruit) and they've maintained a steely resistance to Tropicana's charms ever since.

IF YOU'RE JUST FINDING THIS OUT NOW, MOMS, IT'S REALLY TLTL*

Your teens and tweens are instant messaging using acronyms you could never possibly understand, but, according to this article (and its linked acronym glossary), they all mean, "Sure, I like having sex with grown-ups." (SILHSWG)

* [too little, too late]

I'LL TAKE, "THINGS YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR WHEN YOU WALK IN THE DOOR AT NIGHT FOR $600, ALEX"

As we walked into our home last night, there was Small Fellow, his hand stuffed in the front of his shorts, asking, "Daddy! Guess what I have in here!"

Fortunately, it was only his small stuffed sleeping friend, Puppy, and not some scary monster, but still and all, we plan to keep a healthy distance from Puppy from here on out.

NO, WE DON'T SEE ANY SIMILARITY AT ALL BETWEEN THE ARTICLES IN THIS MAGAZINE AND THOSE IN MONTHLY PARENTING PUBLICATIONS. WHY DO YOU ASK?

New York Dog, the magazine we've declared our archenemy, got a mention in the Washington Post the other day, thanks to recent articles such as "Dogs on Atkins!" and "You've got pee-mail!" Other coverlines mentioned include: "Are mutts the new black?" and "Does your dog need Prozac?" To save you the trouble of paying the newsstand price, we'll answer those questions gratis here:

1. No, they're just mutts. And they're off-brown, like all the rest of them. 2. No, you do.

February 7, 2005 | Permalink | Subscribe to RSS

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