YES, IT'S ANOTHER "STAR ATHLETE WITH AILING CHILD SUFFERING FROM RARE DISEASE" STORY. DOESN'T MEAN IT'S NOT HEARTBREAKING. 

From the Boston Globe's article on baseball veteran and current Red Sox first baseman John Olerud's struggle with his daughter's tri-some 2p, 5p-syndrome:

He wanted so badly to explain why the man with the needle was hurting her. He knew he could not.

Instead, John Olerud blocked out his anguish and held down his daughter Jordan as she squirmed on a doctor's table, being prodded repeatedly. Jordan Olerud had already spent too much of her first three years in a hospital; she certainly didn't deserve this.

The doctor was trying to inject an IV, but Jordan's tiny veins wouldn't cooperate. He tried her wrists. Her feet. The inside of her elbows. Nothing. She was crying, writhing in pain. Olerud held her as, finally, the doctor planted the IV in the middle of Jordan's forehead.

IF YOU WERE HOPING TO MAKE A BIG SPLASH FOR YOUR COMPANY IN THE MEDIA THIS SEASON BY UNVEILING YOUR NEW $799 STROLLER, SORRY. THESE GUYS BEAT YOU BY A C-NOTE.

Say hello to the $899 Orbit Infant System. (Slogan: "You know it's got to be good: It's a SYSTEM.") To our untrained eyes, it looks like a shinier, heavier version of the Snap 'N Go, the most practical baby-carrier we've ever used ($50, not including infant car seat). In a New York Sun piece on the stroller the other day, the Orbit system's designer, Joseph Hei, said:

Most dads spend a lot more money and have nicer golf clubs, for instance, than they do necessary childhood products.

Yes, and the Orbit is nothing if not necessary. As currently configured - an infant car seat snapped onto a stroller - this thing will be "necessary" until your child hits 22 pounds. In other words, maybe 11 months. For $900. Help yourself.


A BILLION DOLLARS? MADRE DE DIOS!

She's bigger than Barney, and she's got Bob the Builder flagging down Thomas the Tank Engine and riding out of town. She's Dora the Explorer, and Slate's story of how the giant-eyed Latina clawed her way to the top of the kid media pile is well worth reading for anyone who wants to understand how companies make millions off all those cheap videos you keep buying.

CAN WE STATION ONE OUTSIDE OUR KITCHEN CABINET TO KEEP SMALL AND TINY FROM EATING ALL OF OUR CRACKERS?

A Japanese company introduces the "Guardrobo D1" robot security guard, to detect intruders, fires, and water leaks, and eventually to turn against its human builders and bring about the Age of the Machines.

June 24, 2005 | Permalink | Subscribe to RSS

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