CRITIC'S CORNER: LOEWS CINEPLEX LINCOLN SQUARE, NEW YORK CITY

We attended (without the kids) the 9:30 Saturday night showing of "Tim Burton's Corpse Bride" at Loews Cineplex (capsule review: If you see just one Tim Burton movie this year, well, go ahead and see any one of them, because at this point they're all pretty much the same). Now, this screening was attended by a disturbingly high number of small children, who probably weren't any more successful staying awake till the end than we were. We decided we'd enjoy a little snack as the film began, so we approached the concession stand and decided that the smallest popcorn and smallest soda would best meet our needs. Turns out, that's the "Kids Combo," and it comes with a toy surprise. By the way: It also costs an astonishing $5.50. So we requested it, but then the high-school junior behind the counter eyed us skeptically and asked, "Is your child with you?" indicating, apparently, that grown-ups aren't allowed to spend $5.50 on a tiny popcorn and soda by themselves. We looked her dead in the eye and said the kids were inside and so she begrudgingly let us contribute we'd guess about $5.15 to the theater's profits -- but she refused to give me the toy surprise.

Thumbs down.

AND CAN WE TALK ABOUT THOSE BABY SLINGS, PEOPLE? IT'S LIKE, LOOK AT ME, I CAN BREASTFEED, AND I'M GONNA RUB IT IN YOUR FACE BY CARRYING MY BABY RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY CHEST. WHERE DO THEY GET OFF? AM I RIGHT, EVERYONE? THANK YOU! I'LL BE HERE ALL WEEK!

The Times style pages recently reported on the never-ending clash between upscale parents who buy oversize, bulldozing strollers (a group which does not include us) and the single hipsters who feel threatened by all that they represent. As with most such articles, there's no news here, just plenty of  folks willing to air their neuroses in the paper of record. Here's a sample:

-- Christopher Peruzzi, 39, of Freehold, N.J., has also had to dodge baby strollers - especially those that are "double wide or triple long" - usually in stores, and he doesn't like it either. "They're blocking off products you want to get to," he said. "I find this particularly annoying in Barnes & Noble and Walden Books. I'm here to read. I'm not here for your kid to slam into me."

-- "These women have a child, and they're like, 'Look at me,' " said Ophira Eisenberg, 33, a stand-up comedian from the West Village who refers to oversize baby strollers as lawn mowers. "It's like this baby is more important than anything, and everyone should be bowing down because they created life."

October 3, 2005 | Permalink | Subscribe to RSS

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