THERE WILL BE A MOMENT OF SILENCE IN SUV BACK SEATS, SCHOOL CAFETERIAS, AND FAMILY DINNER TABLES TONIGHT AT 6:15 PM

The inventor of the chicken nugget has passed away. Innovator Robert C. Baker, who founded Cornell's Institute of Food Science and Marketing in 1970, was 84. Following his long-established wishes, his organs will be donated to science, and both his white and dark meat will be ground up and donated to the cafeteria of the American Poultry Hall of Fame, which inducted him several years ago.

"CAN YOU GUESS WHAT ELMO IS THINKING ABOUT TODAY?
U.S. TROOPS OUT OF IRAQ!"

15rice_lgThe liberals who run PBS have decided to throw caution to the wind, risk their federal funding, and stand up for their pacifist beliefs. As you can see in the photo, "Anti-war Elmo" has been showing up at all of Secretary of State Rice's public appearances to lead protests of the ongoing war in Iraq.

(No, not really.)

MOST OF FELLOW'S HOMEWORK INVOLVES DRAWING PICTURES OF THE PEOPLE AND PLACES IN HIS LIFE. BUT WE CAN'T EVEN DRAW A BELIEVABLE SUN. HOW CAN YOUR SITE HELP US HELP HIM?

The Discovery Channel has launched a new subscription Web site ($9.95 per month) which can help parents help children (grades K-12) with their homework. The new site is called Cosmeo, because Discovery Homework Helper would have been too easy to remember.

TSG, BSFOWTFLOWTD, IWNW*
[This sounds good, but since Fellow only writes the first letters of words these days, it would never work]

The Times Thursday Styles section bemoans the lost art of the written letter, and urges parents to get their children penning missives to grandma post haste.

"MIFFY, A CUTE LITTLE BUNNY
MIFFY, A SMART LITTLE BUNNY
MIFFY, A COPYRIGHT-INFRINGING LITTLE BUNNY"

ImagesListening to Miffy this morning as we ate breakfast (OK, we confess), we heard details of what sounded like a very familiar storyline. It seems Miffy - or it might have been Grunty or Snuffy - really wanted to fly. But she couldn't. And that made her very sad. Finally, Mother Bunny had an idea: She painted Miffy's picture on a kite, and flew it high in the air. "Look, Miffy," Mother Bunny said. "Now you are really flying!" Which was a great idea - the FIRST time we read it, in Bear's Bargain, by Frank Asch. Shame on you, Miffy: You've embarrassed not only yourself, but all the people of the Low Countries.

And another thing: The other storyline in this Miffy episode involved all of the lead characters - including the rabbit, the bear, and the pig - telling Miffy's dog that he couldn't go on the slide, or the merry-go-round, or any of the other cool places the others could go to play, because he was just a dog. Hello! When's the last time anyone saw a bunny, a bear, or a pig on a merry-go-round?

. . . OK, yeah, you're right, we'll go to work now.

March 16, 2006 | Permalink | Subscribe to RSS

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